for Virginia ::: David's Story

Over the next three months David & I communicated via email. He expressed his love for his daughter & the heartache it was to lose her. He expressed the sorrow, the loneliness & his hopes for the memory of Virginia.

I got to know David a little more during those emails. And I got to know who Virginia was for him. She was everything to him!

"I have had dreams, and I have had heartaches, I have lived, I have loved, I have hurt inside and out. Some crushed dreams (my daughter) cannot be overcome, no matter how hard you try. I am a welder by trade and her descansos will last longer than most. But it to will be uprooted at some point by someone who knows nothing of the story that goes with the memorial. It is the passing of wind and sand and time. Perhaps someday they will come to understand the grief that passed that spot so very long ago."

All he wanted to do is pass on his folklore. He wanted someone to listen, maybe someone who could understand the pain. But sadly, I just received a final email saying goodbye.

David was on his way to be by Virginia's side where he can find his happiness again. He did not explain anything more then just "I'm ill" and that he could no longer be in communication. I felt like I was loosing a friend. But he requested that he be allowed to die in peace.

So my reply to David was:

"David, all I know now is that God is there with you & that puts my mind at ease. I WILL find a way of seeing your daughter's descanso. The distance from Florida to Arizona is great, AND it is not going to stop me. Know that I already see your devotion and will get to see your creation. I will continue to have you & your daughter in my thoughts forever.

I wish you well & may God be with you on your journey."

I made a promise to David, that I am not sure how to keep it. I promised him that the memory of his daughter would not vanish with his passing & that the descanso he built for her will be remembered even after its demise.

All David wanted was that the memory of Virginia never fade and that his descanso for her, still remain alive.

All I know of David is his Unconditional Love for his daughter & I cannot let his folklore just vanish. I feel he has entrusted in me, the preservation of Virginia's memory. And now also the preservation of David's story.

Good Bye David.

I Love you Enough...

I just read this great story ::

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter’s departure had been announced.

Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said, “I love you and I wish you enough.” The daughter replied, “Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom.”

They kissed and the daughter left. The mother walked over to the window where I sat. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry. I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, “Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?”

“Yes, I have,” I replied. “Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?” “I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral,” she said. When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, “I wish you enough.” May I ask what that means?”

She began to smile. “That’s a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone.” She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more. “When we said ‘I wish you enough’ we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them”.

Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you posses.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.

She then began to cry and walked away. They say it takes a minute to find a special person, An hour to appreciate them, A day to love them...
and an entire life to forget them.

Memories...

"They who think that you are gone,
because no more your face they see,
are wrong, for in our hearts you live
and always will in memory."

"Healing from grief is not a process of forgetting,
It is the process of remembering with less pain and more joy."